anticipation

Am I anxious? yes. Am I "pee my pants excited"? you bet. Am I nervous? in a way. I'm nervous about expecting too much, nervous that I will not be accepting, nervous that I will pursue my own intentions instead of God's commands for me.

I'm 28 days away from leaving for Haiti. I have my second-to-last team meeting tomorrow, which is also the final payment deadline. 28 days from leaving the comforts of the US for the first time to live 7 days in one of the poorest contries in the world. That's quite drastic.

Am I prepared? I don't know how well one can prepare for a mission. Satan will throw things at ya left and right, but faith in God's power is what will defeat him. Prayer - that is my answer to preparation...a whole lot of it. And scripture. Matthew 10 has been on my heart recently while reading "Radical" by David Platt. This chapter is God's mission for all of his children. We are to go. Go where no one has heard the gospel and preach. Preach so that the lost can hear. Then they will proclaim God's name and be saved.

"Behold I send you out as sheep in the midst of wolves...but when they deliver you up, do not become anxious about how or what you will speak, for it shall be given you in that hour what you are to speak. for it is not you who speak, but it is the spirit of your Father who speaks in you..." Matthew 10:16, 19-20

That makes me less nervous. I may not have a clue what I am going to encounter, but I know Jesus will give me words to share to all those adorable kiddos, struggling parents, and lost villagers in every situation my team and I are put in.

As for my summer class that starts on Monday, "pee my pants excited" is the exact opposite phrase that I would use. I can not share with you the amount of dread I have when it comes to deciphering audiograms.